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Julie Answers: How can I get over the sudden loss of a relationship?
Hank’s question: My girlfriend of five years ended our relationship suddenly by moving out while I was at work. I thought our relationship was relatively positive. We were not arguing or fighting. She got quiet with me for a few days prior. I’m lost and looking for a healthy recovery.
Dear Hank,
It is a wise decision to reach out and seek support for yourself in the aftermath of such a jarring experience, and I am glad that you did. Any break-up is extremely painful (and especially so after a multi-year relationship), but it sounds like you were blindsided when your girlfriend took this extreme action out of the blue. That kind of shock can leave a person reeling and intensify the pain and confusion that heartbreak already entails.
The tone of your question makes me hopeful. I say that because, no matter how much you are hurting, you ultimately say that you are looking for a healthy recovery. That shows that you know healing is possible, inevitable really, and that it just is a matter of how you get there, and how you take care of yourself along the way.
I’m guessing that questions like, “Why?” and “What happened?” are running through your mind. A person’s first response, when caught off guard like this, is often to try and make sense of the situation…
